Month 8

Dear Ali,

Every month I usually say I can't believe the time went so fast. This month however, didn't go fast and I LOVED it. I kept thinking, "Did I forget to take Ali's monthly picture and write her letter?", only to realize I still had two weeks, or a week. If only your whole life could go this slow! ;) You were a pretty good girl this month and we are finally getting some real belly laughs and smiles out of you! You are COMPLETELY mobile and army crawl SO fast around the house. You can crawl on all fours but for some reason prefer scooting around on your tummy. You do this "downward dog" type yoga pose when going from "crawling" to sitting. It's so cute. You have to go up on your toes and hands before falling on your bum. I need to get it on video. You've started to shed some baby fat because you're always on the go. So sad. I think you are even busier than your brother was, which is saying a lot! You want to touch everything, and you hardly ever let me hold you unless you don't feel good. You just want to be down exploring on your own! Daddy had to give you the Heimlich maneuver this month because you were exploring and got a piece of tape in your mouth. Mommy was at work and daddy saved your life! He's already your hero, and I know he will continue to be throughout your life :) You are still an amazing eater. You eat anything and everything without complaining and you LOVE meal times. You even love tofu! Just straight tofu. It's crazy. We have started weaning you from breast feeding, and I thought it would be much harder than it has been. Though this same week that we've been weaning, you have some kind of virus or are teething so I have been feeding you a little more than planned. You get about 50 % breastmilk and 50% formula because I'm pumping to give you breast milk still.

You were sleeping through the night until you caught this little bug. It's always something, I swear! But soon you will be back to sleeping like a champ, I'm sure. Luke is still your favorite person, though you seem to like pestering each other more and more every day. He knows how to push your buttons and you his. Crazy how that already starts. But you love following him around the house and try to do everything he is doing.

Even though you are a crazy baby, you still take time out to give me cuddles and kisses. You are a total mama's girl and I love it. I hope it never changes. You can say "dada" "mama" and "yaya" but I still haven't figured out if you know what you are saying! You know your name and you know Luke's name.

You still light up our lives sweetie! Your smile and coo's are sometimes what keeps us going. Things slowed down a little but I know December will fly by, and soon it will be 2014 and three months away from you turning 1!! I can't believe that. In the mean time, I'm going to soak up every bit of this stage that you're in. It's so fun to watch you discover things and try things on your own now that you're mobile and "talking" more.

I love you more than words. And it grows every day!

Mom

Month 7

Dear Ali-gator-

You are getting to be such a big girl. You spent much of this month with a cold. Dang it, we just can't have one good month! (Or week, for that matter.) You are definitely growing out of your tummy troubles though, I think. Now if we could just have your teeth start coming in, and get your bowels working properly, we would all be happy campers! You are starting to scoot and roll all over the whole house and soon you'll be crawling. You LOVE to explore just like your brother did. You love your bath, just like your brother did. But, you love food WAY more than your brother. You will eat anything, at any time. Not picky at all. I hope that continues because Luke is super picky to this day. We went to Disneyland again this month! It was your 4th time there, and you seemed to enjoy it the most this time. ;) You were alert during all the shows and loved looking around at all the Halloween decorations. Hopefully we will make it back a few more times before you turn 1 because then our annual passes won't be good anymore.

You are a huge mama's girl. You want to be held by me all day every day, and often times whine for me even when daddy holds you. But once you are around someone for a while, you will let them hold you. I hope that you continue to love me, but also open up to others, or else we will have a tough time weaning you, or ever being apart for longer than a few hours! You have said "mama" before, but your favorite is "dada". You babble "dada" all day long. Still deciding if you know what it means. ;)

This month, for the first time, you decided sometimes your brother can be a pest! You love him most of the time, but sometimes he gets on your nerves and I find it hilarious!

You've eaten squash, carrots, peas, green beans, sweet potatoes, bananas, apples, peaches, and avacados. I'm excited to try even more food this month, and next month you get to try quinoa! So exited for that, because we have started eating more and more of that good stuff around here.

Having a girl has been so fun for me. I have a special bond with my baby boy, and I have a different special bond with my baby girl. I understand my relationship with my own mom so much better now that I have a daughter. You are my princess, and I feel so much when I look at you. Happiness, peace, eternal love, awed, thankful, to name a few. You are beautiful and I always look forward to seeing you grow and develop. My favorite time of day is getting you up in the morning or from naps. (Usually, if you've slept well enough.) You are all smiles and giggles and coos.

You have added so much to our family and we all are over the moon in love with you sweetie pie! Stop growing so fast because I want to munch on your chunky cheeks and thighs a bit longer!

Love,

Mom

P.S. You will notice from your pics you were MUCH happier this month. :) Don't mind your bow in half the pics, It matched in real life but the camera made it look weird! ;(

Update

I'm kind of sad the blogging world seems to be fading out. (Well, family blogs, not so much business blogs.) I haven't been as good as I used to be, and it makes me sad because I don't journal near as much as I should, so this is a good substitute. The last few updates have been mostly letters to my children, so I figure I'll do an update about life in general!

Drew:
Started his 4th year as a hospitality teacher at East Career and Technical Academy in August. He still LOVES his job, and I'm so glad. I also love his job because it's a great school and his hours are amazing for family time. The fact that he is home every day at 2:30 keeps me sane. He will be done with his Masters of Education in Administration in April, and we are both looking forward to that! Though the past year and a half of classes has FLOWN by. He has class every Monday and Wednesday from 5-8 and we have a routine now so it's not so bad. Once he gets his Masters, he is hoping to get a job as a Dean, hopefully at the same school he teaches at now. The technicality of administration is to be a Dean for two years before applying for Assistant Principal or Principal positions. He is open to schools/areas everywhere, so we will see what our future holds.

Me (Kylie):
Aside from loving my job as a mommy to two angels (I use that term lightly), I also got a job at a 3D ultrasound studio called Miracle in Progress. I work the front desk 2 days a week and it's PERFECT. We were lucky enough to find an awesome babysitter, who comes to our house the days I work. It's hard to leave my babies but my job is SO fun and they have fun with Kim and Kason at home. (Kason is a month younger than Ali, so Kim has her hands full for sure! ;) Now to mention the dilemma of the century: to go back to school, or not. I have decided if I ever return to school, it will be in Ultrasound imaging. I love being a Medical Assistant, and could be happy doing that the rest of my life. AND at my new job, I am being trained to do the 3D ultrasounds. (Pictures of baby's face/hands/feet and gender predictions. Nothing diagnostic or no measurements.) It is SOOOO fun, but it only solidifies the thought in my mind that all I would want to do is Ultrasounds if I go back to school. So I think I will apply to the program this spring. If I get in, we will decide if it's meant to be, and if I don't, then I will most likely continue being a Medical Assistant and maybe do 3D ultrasounds forever! ;) PLUS being a mommy is a big job too.

Luke:
Is now 3.5 going on 10. He amazes me every day with the things he comes up with or thinks about. He is loving preschool and is learning so much! We absolutely love his preschool because they incorporate all kinds of extra-curricular things like movement (dancing, karate, tumbling), singing and acting on top of regular stuff like science, math, reading, etc. He comes home with a new song or poem almost every day ;) We hope he continues to excel and love school as much as he already does! He keeps us on our toes because he is always on the go and doesn't like to sit and relax, ever. (What 3 year old does?) But he is hilarious and his sweet personality is something I am so grateful for in my life. My favorite phrase of his is, "Oh. My. Gosh!" (extremely dramatically.) I need to start writing down all the funny things he says. I forget them if I don't. We sure love our energetic, strong-willed, sweet little boy.

Ali:
I update on her through her monthly letters, which I need to write right now! (How did the month 6-7 go by so fast?!) So I will update on her there. :)

This past month was CRAZY busy. We were able to go to Disneyland for the Trick or Treat Halloween party since we have annual passes. It was so much fun! A little crowded but the kids had fun! (And by kids I mean Drew and Luke.) We loved dressing the kids up like Jack and Sally from Nightmare Before Christmas and they were a huge hit at Disney! We have been on the go since October 1st and I'm so happy October is gone! We can now relax a little.

 

Overall we are happy and healthy. We have had a very rough year starting out with me on bed rest and having a difficult end of pregnancy, to then having an extremely emotional and difficult baby girl. But we are so blessed and recognize our blessings daily. Sometimes it is hard but at the end of the day when we look at our accomplishments and the happy times, there's nothing but love (and  a lot of chaos)! ;)

Month 6

Dear Ali,

This past month was one of THE hardest months of my life. We have been in and out of doctor offices trying to figure out what can possibly be making you so sad/uncomfortable. After many tests and opinions, we have finally decided what we think might be the problem. We still don't know for sure, which is extremely frustrating. But, with multiple opinions from doctors, google, test results, and mother's instinct, we have diagnosed you with a peak in acid reflux, and a sensitive stomach (in general.) Your leukocytes in your stool sample were elevated, usually indicating an infection, but since you don't have a fever or show any other signs of infection, the doctor says this usually means a lactose sensitivity. (But could mean wheat, soy, eggs, peanuts, etc.) Last month we had switched acid reflux medications to a cheaper med, and though it took us a month to figure out, I think that might have caused you to have more symptoms and be uncomfortable. Basically, it's been a rough month. But after putting you back on the {expensive but worth it} other medication, cutting out all dairy, and watching my intake of other allergy/gas producing foods, you seem to be much better. We almost weaned you from breast feeding completely, and after two days, I changed my mind and am working on getting my awesome supply back. I think it's finally coming back, but that was stressful too!

Anyway, we are hoping and praying that the worst is over and that we are right in thinking your acid reflux is just peaking, as well as your digestive system still maturing. If we continue to have good days, I think we are right! You have slept MUCH better the past three nights than you have in the past two months. So we'll see.

Since this month was so up and down, you are pretty much schedule-less. You do basically the same things each day, but never at the same time. (We are going to work on that this month!) You started solids a little bit at the 6 month mark just last week. I waited due to the new guidelines on waiting as well as your tummy troubles. So far you have tried green beans, carrots, apples, peaches, and a little banana. You eat like a champ and I'm excited to keep introducing new foods. Hoping they help and not hurt your digestion! It's SUPER fun to make baby food for you.

You still love your big brother so much and could just watch him all day long. Sometimes you do. And you are very much a mommy's girl. You loved your daddy too, but my heart melts every time I see you kick your legs and squeal when you see me. We are having issues with strangers/anyone besides your immediate family pretty much. Whenever we go to the gym we all leave frustrated because you can't seem to let anybody else hold you if we aren't in site. It's really traumatic for you.

You finally sit up for long amounts of time before toppling over! Such a big girl, it's crazy how fast the time has gone. I hope the next 6 months are easier for all of us so that we can enjoy them a little more.

I love you with all my heart and our family wouldn't be the same without you, Ali-gator. (That's your new nick name we've sort of started calling you....we'll see if it sticks.)

You were super fussy for your photo shoot this month. Go figure. :) It was fitting for how the month went! So here are the few I got where you're NOT screaming.

Love you to the moon my princess!

Mom

Reflection

Whenever I wake up on September 11th each year, I can't help but feel somber. I still vividly remember that day 12 years ago, and how it affected my family, specifically my dad. He was in D.C. on that day, and watched the Pentagon burn from his building. He has always had a gift for writing, and has written many amazing poems since then. I would like to post them somewhere for others who might appreciate them. :)

Written on the night of September 11, 2001 in D.C.

Shades of Gray and Gold

Streaking planes, steel gray,
become hatred-fueled, human-filled missiles
bursting into flames of gold.
Inverse eruptions, concrete gray,
descend from two tall, too-tall towers
murdering traders of gold.

Billowing clouds, smoke gray,
rise from a fire-scarred, five-sided building
melting epaulets of gold.

Towering spires, granite gray,
proud with world-warning, truth-trumpeting angel
glowing in robes of gold …
What will this mean for you ?

Prophets inspired, bridging shades of gray
between peace and patriotism, poverty and pride,
speaking from hearts of gold …
When will it end?

Emotions torn, outlook gray,
pure-pacifist parents of soldier-age sons
turning the page from a Golden Age …
Where will we turn?

Why is it allowed, this graying trial?
Who will end it? …
How is it more precious than gold?

Written 1 year later, September 11, 2002.

D.C.

A scene of the Crime

and time

has made the wall whole.

The stone is new-quarried,

but seems more vulnerable.



NYC

A scene of the Crime

and time

has left the hole depressing.

The skyline is cleaner,

but seems soiled by void.



PA.

A scene of the Crime

and time

has the depression healing.

The charred scar is greening,

but seems infected.


I

have seen the scenes

and time

has not healed, cleaned, made whole.

My heart, still scarred,

is infected, soiled and vulnerable.


Written 5 years later. September 11, 2006

September Mourn


A perfect redpurple dawn.

A quarter-score years and ten days ago I sat on this same step.

Lincoln, in his temple, dressed in white looked out over my head

at this same monumental view.


A repeat redpurple dawn

a quarter-score years and ten days after four planes sliced this same sky

Washington’s obelisk, still stark white, points to heaven over anation

monumentally changed.


Written 10 years later. September 11, 2011

Thoughts on the State of the Union


6:46 MST 9/11/01


The 2,731 in the towers and Pentagon:

"beautiful morning"

"hope they got off to school OK"

"we are special, even righteous"

"our just actions have been rewarded"

"yesterday NPR said we are the new Rome"

"we are strong"



The 246 on flights 11, 175, 77, 93:

"beautiful morning"

"good day to travel"

"I wonder if he, she, they are awake yet?"

"why are those guys yelling?"



The 19 killers:

"beautiful morning"

"we are special"

"we are righteous"

"our action is just"

"God will reward us"

"we will defeat the Crusaders"

The 3 or 4 planners:

"they are weak"

"we can use our young, desperate,

devoted to kill some frighten the rest"

"we can lure them here,

get them to compromise their ideals,

divide them, break them"


6:45 MST 9/11/11


The 6 million across the "homeland:"

"what (or who) is next?"

"why are we still over there?"

"why did we compromise - why so weak?"

"whence our reputation for justice, peace?"

"we are divided and broke"



The 136 passengers on

AA flight 385 to Dallas/Fort Worth:

"it must be on every passenger's mind"

"will it be mentioned?"

"moment of silence?"

"or are flight crews superstitious?"

"who is that olive-skinned guy across the aisle?"

"I hope he doesn't stand up."


Written 11 years later. September 11, 2012.

On this date


On the morning

Of the eleventh day

Of the ninth month

In 1857

True believers murdered innocents

In a meadow

In southern Utah

In the name of God



On the morning

Of the ninth day

Of the eleventh month

In 1938

True believers murdered innocents

In a ghetto

In Poland

In the name of God



On the morning

Of the eleventh day

Of the ninth month

In 2001

True believers murdered innocents

In towers

In New York

In the name of God



On the morning

Of the first resurrection

Of the human race

In the future

Innocents will stand as witnesses

In testimony

In his presence

In the name of God



Those who did not question

Who blindly followed

Who did not doubt

Will reap their reward

In eternity

In the name of God


I am very thankful for my dad, and these words. Tears this morning as I read these beautiful works of art. Here are some pictures of a few of my visits to NYC and DC. Love those cities.